Processing my divorce

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We sat side by side naked in the warm luxurious Jacuzzi under the stars like many times before. I felt so loved, so safe in the familiar space created between his chest and his arms, feeling his heart beat, my leg touching his. Relaxed knowing the kids were safe and sound asleep in their beds. I teared up a little as I turned away, not knowing how my husband of twelve years would re-act to my pressing thoughts I felt so necessary for him to know.

I suppose it was good timing to talk about the future.

The months passed and he had become a stranger which was more enjoyable when not around. A forbidding "party-er" choosing to be further and further away from family as I became more and more unwilling to accommodate to the changes.

In less time than it takes to make a baby, this man had gone from my protector to my persecutor. My ally to my greatest threat. My best friend to my biggest hater. And instead of professing love, he was waging war.